"CONFIDENCE" is a cult
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Edited by Vitoria G
Confidence Culture by Rosalind Gill & Shani Orgad
0:00 – intro
6:15 – wokewashing
18:11 – the one track lane to confidence
Disclaimer: This content including advice provides generic information only. It is in no way a substitute for a qualified medical opinion. Always consult a specialist or your own doctor for more information.
Keywords: confidence,culure,video essay,analysis,mina le,that girl,tiktok,lean in,rihanna,shani orgad,rosalind gill,vox,the atlantic,commentary,feminism,intersectional,wokewashing,nasty gal,boohoo,lululemon
the way financially secure people are so unapologetically callous towards other workers… whose capital are you protecting?
Thank you Mina, thank you! I agree with every single thought you shared here. Living in Germany today, yes, I share your anger (14:00). Confidence comes from security. Not everyone has security.
i dont even want to think
i feel like what a lot of "that girl" movement stuff messes up with why you should be the best version of yourself. for example, doing skin care so others dont think you're lazy vs. doing it for health or to feel good. its a small issue compared to the other ones but that small one made a huge difference for me. then again im a skinny white girl with a small/ wideish hips so that also played a part 🙂
I would consider myself a very critical person around normalized subjects, but I was never able to look at the concept of confidence from this point of view. I feel like it helped me a lot to ease the burden of trying to just be "that guy" everyday 🙂 amazing video like always
Very well done video. I have a lot of thoughts. I think it’s important to mention how the confidence cult affects the marginalized community of disabled people. As someone with an “invisible” physical disability and mental health disabilities, the job world has been hell.
It’s hard to be disabled and look for work. You are told to disclose at the interview and they are legally not allowed to discriminate against you, but they will.
I applied for a part time retail job and had 6 years of retail/work experience at the time. I decided to be upfront and disclose that I needed to have access to a chair due to my disability (I mean retail jobs really shouldn’t REQUIRE you stand all day, especially if you’re just at a register). Once I disclosed that the tone changed and he avoided telling me that I got the job days later. I had to call them and he passively emailed me days later saying he found “more qualified candidates”.
The average college student worker had less years of work experience than me, so I knew that was BS.
confidence is an emotion, and its time we all see it that way. its as fleeting as sadness or anger or lust.
bro the add on this video literally talked about confidence, what a cohencidence 😳
Reason 1001 we need universal basic income
In my ideal lifestyle I wouldn’t have to wake up to 10 to 12. I’m a night person and I’m not at my full brain power before that. Idk why being “that girl “ I have to wake up at 5am lol. I’m more productive and energized later in the day.
Please listen to the GOOD ADVICE at 13:00 & ASK FOR MORE WHEN OFFERED A SALARY! It doesn't matter what fantasy one has about how companies "should" run; if you're not willing to advocate for yourself IRL, you're leaving money on the table for the next male (or business savvy female) they hire to snap up instead of you. Or maybe it will go to your boss as a bonus, or to that annoying guy who talks over you in meetings for a mid-year raise he thinks he deserves "just because!" (That's the classic "confidence cult:" male entitlement!)
It is absolute balderdash and unworthy of the usual high standards of this channel to fearmonger unsubstantiated claims like the one around 14:00: "…there are some employers out there who will just not offer you the job if you ask for a salary that's too high." If you've already gotten an offer, that's hogwash! It is NORMAL & EXPECTED to ask for a higher salary after receiving an offer with a proposed number! To repeat: normal & EXPECTED!
You can easily do research on this to prove it yourself. Now, would I put my desired salary on anything BEFORE an offer? No. But that's a different situation. And if they're adamant they can't go higher than the salary they offered, you might be able to get other perks instead (more paid leave, flexible schedule for child pickups, a better title, bonuses for reaching X or Y milestone, etc.).
I was fortunate to have a kind ex-brother-in-law who encouraged me and walked me through this process, and it was STILL uncomfortable for me. But I believe it's worth it as a gender equality issue, and also as a practical form of self-care and self-respect. The thousands of extra dollars I made per year at my last long-term job added up to a LOT over the years I was at the company, and set my salary higher at the next job I applied for, and so on.
It is not an exaggeration to say that over the course of your career, willingness to have these brief, usually less than 5 minute conversations could literally add or subtract tens or even hundreds of thousands of dollars to your lifetime earnings!
Ask for what you think your best friend deserves! You can do it!
Productivity is when aesthetic pens and flip clocks
I didn't know what an InstaTherapist was & as you explain I thought it's like horoscopes… and that was your next line.
Pretty sure the medical help for blowing your back out is taking basic pain killed. I blew my neck out and just had to take paracetamol and ibuprofen I had at home plus a tip to apply some heat
You look so much like Gigi hadid
The lulu lemon “ur choice” thing gives me the same energy as mr krabs implementing the new rule “you shall never deny a customer even the most ridiculous request” and the entire episode squidward is just abused 💀
A year ago I was so deep into a hole of mental illness that it was either make a drastic change or (to me it felt like) die. I got off social media, started making healthy choices for myself, etc. While it worked for a while, it didn’t save me or cure me. And that’s because we aren’t supposed to be okay constantly. The pressure I have felt since feeling so great from the life changes (and then the comedown after) has been enormous. Because while we can make good choices, life is still unpredictable and we must go through things in order to grow as people. You can’t escape this process no matter how much yoga you do or water you drink! Thank you for this video, I honestly feel as though I have blindly fallen into another trap the internet has set for me and everyone else in the world by believing that I’m still not “there yet” because I’m not 100% confident or happy all the time. That’s just life baby 💋
Gen x dude here. My god social media has made life so complicated. All this shit is due to algorithms controlling what we see. Delete your socials.
lol if only you could live this same experience as a feminized male. my wurd. i hate life so much.